one speaking and the other echoing, repeating, clarifying, interpreting correctly-a faithful
and untarnished mirror? (Grunberger, 1979; P. 49).
The Mirror Transference
Once the therapeutic relationship is established two transference like phenomena, the
mirror transference and the idealizing transference, collectively known as selfobject
transference emerge. The mirror transference will occur when the therapist provides a
strong sense of validation to the narcissist. Recall that the narcissistically injured child
failed to receive validation for what he or she was. The child thus concluded that there is
something wrong with his or her feelings, resulting in a severe damage to the child?s self-
esteem. By reflecting back to the narcissist his or her accomplishments and grandeur the
narcissist?s self esteem and internal cohesion are maintained (Manfield, 1992).
There are three types of the mirror transference phenomenon, each corresponding to a
different level of narcissism (as discussed previously). The merger transference will
occur in those narcissists who are unable to distinguish between the object and the self.
Such narcissists will perceive the therapist to be a virtual extension of themselves. The
narcissist will expect the therapist to be perfectly resonant to him or her, as if the
therapist is an actual part of him or her. If the therapist should even slightly vary from
the narcissist?s needs or opinions, the narcissist will experience a painful breach in the
cohesive selfobject function provided by the therapist. Such patients will then likely feel
betrayed by the therapist and will respond by withdrawing themselves from the therapist
(Manfield, 1992).
In the second type of mirror transference, the twinship or alter-ego transference, the
narcissist perceives the therapist to be psychologically similar to himself or herself.
Conceptually the narcissist perceives the therapist and himself or herself to be twins,
separate but alike. In the twinship transference for the selfobject cohesion to be
maintained, it is necessary for the narcissist to view the therapist as ?just like me?
(Manfield, 1992).
The third type of mirror transference is again termed the mirror transference. In this
instance the narcissist is only interested in the therapist to the extent that the therapist can
reflect his or her grandiosity. In this transference relationship the function of the
therapist is to bolster the narcissist?s insecure self (Manfield, 1992).
The Idealizing Transference
The second selfobject transference, the idealizing transference, involves the
borrowing of strength from the object (the therapist) to maintain an internal sense of
cohesion. By idealizing the therapist to whom the narcissist feels connected, the
narcissist by association also uplifts himself or herself. It is helpful to conceptualize the
?idealizing? narcissist as an infant who draws strength from the omnipotence of the
caregiver. Thus, in the idealizing transference the therapist symbolizes omnipotence and
this in turn makes the narcissist feel secure. The idealization of the object can become so
important to the narcissist that in many cases he or she will choose to fault himself or
herself, rather than blame the therapist (Manfield, 1992).
The idealizing transference is a more mature form of transference than the mirror
transference because idealization requires a certain amount of internal structure (i.e.,
separateness from the therapist). Oftentimes, the narcissist will first develop a mirror
transference, and only when his or her internal structure is sufficiently strong will the
idealizing transference develop (Manfield, 1992).
Utilizing the Transference Relationship in Therapy
The selfobject transference relationships provide a stabilizing effect for the narcissist.
The supportive therapist thus allows the narcissist to heal his or her current low self
esteem and reinstate the damaged grandiosity. However, healing the current narcissistic
injury does not address the underlying initial injury and in particular the issue of the false
self. To address these issues the therapist must skillfully take advantage of the situations
when the narcissist becomes uncharacteristically emotional; that is when the narcissist
feels injured. It thus becomes crucial that within the context of the transference
relationship, the therapist shift the narcissist?s focus towards his or her inner feelings
(Manfield, 1992).
The prevailing opinion amongst Psychodynamic theorists is that the best way to
address the narcissist?s present experience, is to utilize a hands-off type of approach.
This can be accomplished by letting the narcissist ?take control? of the sessions,
processing the narcissist?s injuries as they inevitably occur during the course of
treatment. When a mirror transference develops injuries will occur when the therapist
improperly understands and/or reflects the narcissist?s experiences. Similarly, when an
idealizing transference is formed injuries will take the form of some disappointment with
the therapist which then interferes with the narcissist?s idealization of the therapist. In
either case, the narcissist is trying to cover up the injury so that the therapist will not
notice it. It remains up to the therapist to recognize the particular defense mechanisms
that the narcissist will use to defend against the pain of the injury, and work backwards
from there to discover the cause of the injury (Manfield, 1992).
Once the cause of the injury is discovered the therapist must carefully explore the
issue with the narcissist, such that the patient does not feel threatened. The following
case provides a good example of the patience and skill that the therapist must possess in
dealing with a narcissistic patient. ??a female patient in her mid-thirties came into a
session feeling elated about having gotten a new job. All she could talk about is how
perfect this job was; there was no hint of introspection or of any dysphoric affect. The
therapist could find no opening and made no intervention the entire session except to
acknowledge the patient?s obvious excitement about her new job. Then, as the patient
was leaving, the therapist noticed that she had left her eyeglasses on the table. He said,
?you forgot your glasses,? to which she responded with an expression of surprise and
embarrassment saying, ?Oh, how clumsy of me.? This response presented the therapist
with a slight seem in the grandiose armor and offered the opportunity for him to
intervene. He commented, ?You are so excited about the things that are happening to
you that this is all you have been able to think about; in the process you seem to have
forgotten a part of yourself.? The patient smiled with a mixture of amusement
and recognition. In this example the patient is defending throughout the session and in a
moment of surprise she is embarrassed and labels herself ?clumsy?, giving the therapist
the opportunity to interpret the defense (her focus on the excitement of the external
world) and how it takes her away from herself? (Manfield, 1992; PP. 168-169).
The cure of the narcissist than does not come from the selfobject transference
relationships per se. Rather, the selfobject transference function of the therapist is
curative only to the extent that it provides an external source of support which enables
the narcissist to maintain his or her internal cohesion. For the narcissist to be cured, it is
necessary for him or her to create their own structure (the true self). The healing process
is thus lengthy, and occurs in small increments whenever the structure supplied by the
therapist is inadvertently interrupted. In this context it is useful to recall Kohut?s concept
of optimal frustration. ?If the interruptions to the therapist?s selfobject function are not
so severe as to overwhelm the patient?s deficient internal structure, they function as
optimal frustrations, and lead to the patient?s development of his own internal structure
to make up for the interrupted selfobject function? (Manfield, 1992; P. 167).
The Jungian (Analytical) Perspective of Narcissism
Analytical psychology views narcissism as a disorder of Self-estrangement, which
arises out of inadequate maternal care. However, prior to tackling narcissism it is useful
to grasp the essence of analytical thought.
The Ego and the Self in Analytical Psychology
It is important to understand that the Self in analytical psychology takes on a different
meaning than in psychodynamic thought (Self is thus capitalized in analytical writings to
distinguish it from the psychodynamic concept of the self). In psychodynamic theory the
self is always ego oriented, that is the self is taken to be a content of the ego. By
contrast, in analytical psychology the Self is the totality of the psyche, it is the archetype
of wholeness and the regulating center of personality. Moreover, the Self is also the
image of God in the psyche, and as such it is experienced as a transpersonal power which
transcends the ego. The Self therefore exists before the ego, and the ego subsequently
emerges from the Self (Monte, 1991).
Within the Self we perceive our collective unconscious, which is made up of
primordial images, that have been common to all members of the human race from the
beginning of life. These primordial images are termed archetypes, and play a significant
role in the shaping of the ego. Therefore, ?When the ego looks into the mirror of the
Self, what it sees is always ?unrealistic? because it sees its archetypal image which can
never be fit into the ego? (Schwartz-Salant, 1982; P. 19).
Narcissism as an Expression of Self-Estrangement
In the case of the narcissist, it is the shattering of the archetypal image of the mother
which leads to the narcissistic manifestation. The primordial image of the mother
symbolizes paradise, to the extent that the environment of the child is perfectly designed
to meet his or her needs. No mother, however, can realistically fulfill the child?s
archetypal expectations. Nevertheless, so long as the mother reasonably fulfills the
child?s needs he or she will develop ?normally?. It is only when the mother fails to be a
?good enough mother?, that the narcissistic condition will occur (Asper, 1993).
When the mother-child relationship is damaged the child?s ego does not develop in an
optimal way. Rather than form a secure ?ego-Self axis? bond, the child?s ego experiences
estrangement from the Self. This Self-estrangement negatively affects the child?s ego,
and thus the narcissist is said to have a ?negativized ego?. The negativized ego than
proceeds to compensate for the Self-estrangement by suppressing the personal needs
which are inherent in the Self; thus ?the negativized ego of the narcissistically
disturbed person is characterized by strong defense mechanisms and ego rigidity. A
person with this disturbance has distanced himself from the painful emotions of negative
experiences and has become egoistic, egocentric, and narcissistic? (Asper, 1993; P. 82).
Analytical Treatment of Narcissism
Since the narcissistic condition is a manifestation of Self-estrangement, the analytical
therapist attempts to heal the rupture in the ego-Self axis bond, which was created by the
lack of good enough mothering. To heal this rupture the therapist must convey to the
narcissist through emphatic means that others do care about him or her; that is the
therapist must repair the archetype of the good mother through a maternally caring
approach (Asper, 1993).
A maternal approach involves being attentive to the narcissist?s needs. Just as a
mother can intuitively sense her baby?s needs so must the therapist feel and observe what
is not verbally expressed by the narcissist. Such a maternal approach allows the
narcissist to experience more sympathy towards his or her true feelings and thus
gradually the need to withdraw into the narcissistic defense disappears (Asper, 1993).
The Existential Perspective of Narcissism
Existentialists perceive narcissism to be a byproduct of an alienating society. It is
difficult for the individual to truly be himself or herself because society offers many
rewards for the individual who conforms to its rules. Such an individual becomes
alienated because he or she feels that society?s rituals and demands grant him or her little
significance and options in the control of his or her own destiny. To compensate such an
individual takes pleasure in his or her own uniqueness (grandiosity), he or she enjoys
what others cannot see and control. Thus, the alienated person ?sees himself as a puppet
cued by social circumstances which exact ritualized performances from him. His
irritation about the inevitability of this is counterbalanced by one major consolation.
This consists of his narcissistic affection for his own machinery-that is, his own processes
and parts? (Johnson, 1977; P. 141).
Existential Treatment of Narcissism
The existential treatment of the narcissist is based on the existential tenant that ?all
existing persons have the need and possibility of going out from their centeredness to
participate in other beings? (Monte, 1991; P. 492). The severely alienated narcissistic
individual, however, does not believe in the validity of experience outside of the self.
Unlike others, the narcissist does not believe that a constructive relationship with others
is possible. Existentialists therefore believe that the therapist, through emphatic
understanding, must create a strong bond with the narcissist, so that he or she can see that
others have feelings too (Johnson, 1977).
The Humanistic (Client-Centered) Perspective of Narcissism
Thus far, no specific formulations have been advanced by humanistic theorists about
the etiology of the narcissistic condition. Nevertheless, by utilizing general humanistic
principles it is possible to explain narcissism. Essentially, much like the psychodynamic
explanation, humanistic psychology would argue that narcissism results when individuals
are not ?allowed? to truly be who they are.
According to humanistic theory, humans have an innate need for self actualization.
We want to be the best person that we could possibly be. This is accomplished by
internalizing the behaviors that fit with the individual?s personal self concept (that which
the individual finds to be appealing). However the self is also subject to pressure from
significant others. Significant others place upon the individual, conditions of worth,
upon which their love and approval is dependent. These conditions may or may not be
congruent with the individual?s personal self. If they contrast sharply with the personal
self, and the individual does not want to risk loosing the approval or love of significant
others, then that individual will behave in ways maladaptive to his or her self
actualization needs.
Although humanistic theory does not elaborate on the specificity of these maladaptive
behaviors, it is possible to speculate that narcissism is one possible outcome.
Specifically, the